FRODO'S JOURNAL - A day in the life of a Hobbit of the Shire. (Pre-Quest Years)

I found myself wandering in the woods today, so deep in thought that I quite lost track of the time and it was late afternoon before I started back to Bag End. It was fortunate that I came to myself when I did, for I remebered that I had a singing lesson scheduled with Sparrow Singswell.

Luckily I made it home with perhaps a half hour to spare, so I put on a pot of tea and laid out some seed cakes for refreshment afterwards. Miss Sparrow is not only an accomplished musician and gifted singer, she is also an excellent teacher and very pleasant to look upon, too. I must admit that it can be quite a challenge to keep one's mind on the singing lesson. But Sparrow is quite serious when it comes to music, tolerating no distractions.

After she departed, I readied myself for a small dinner party that my cousin Mundee had arranged. Perhaps I shall have even more to set down in my journal after this night's entertainment.

*****

Here I sit, about to add another notation to my journal and I'm confronted by the last few words of the above entry. My speculation was quite justified. I do, indeed, have something to write about.

However, before I set down the events of the dinner, perhaps I'd best clarify my thoughts, although that seems more and more difficult to do these days. There were moments, right after Bilbo's departure in which I would experience sudden urges to run out of the front door of Bag End and strike out on my own adventure. But Bilbo left me as Master of Bag End, and as such I felt a sort of responsibility to live up to all that entailed, or at least that's the excuse I gave myself. And, there might be time later on for going away. That's what I told myself then, and what I still tell myself now. For ofttimes of late, I still experience a desire to take to the roads, especially when the days seem to roll on slowly and endlessly and I find myself listening to some dreary, unimaginative conversation of one of the aged patrons that frequent the common room of The Ivy Bush or The Green Dragon. It has often set me to wondering if anything could stir the inhabitants of this quiet countryside out of their state of complacency. Frequently, I have felt that perhaps an invasion of dragons might be good for them. But, that sentiment doesn't always apply, and in particular to certain Hobbits that I'm acquainted with. Several of my kin fall under that second category. On occasion they are anything but complacent. I shall now cite a prime example.

It seems that Mundee's dinner party was not to be the quiet affair that I had imagined. I had expected a relaxing evening and a full stomach. As it happened, I did manage to achieve the latter.

Upon my arrival I joined the other guests in the parlour while we waited for Sally Underhill, Mundee's housekeeper and cook, to put the finishing touches on the dinner. A surprise greeted me when I discovered who some of the other guests were.

Orgulas Maggot, who happens to be none other than the second eldest son of Farmer Maggot, was there. Thankfully, Orgie, as he is better known amongst his friends, doesn't hold it against me for raiding his father's mushroom crop so many years ago. On Orgie's arm was his lady friend, Marain Farrdaughter. She's not the sort of girl one usually sees in the Shire, tiny even for a typical tweenaged Shire lass. she has an almost wild, untamed beauty about her, with blue-green eyes coupled with wild, honey-red hair.

The other guests were Mundee's cousins and foster parent's, Bodo and Lavender Baggins, of Woodhall. Not all that surprising really, but what was rather startling was the fact that their daughter, Bennie, who also happens to be Mundee's foster sister had accompanied them. Bennie looked her loveliest, even donning a dress for the occasion, instead of her usual boy's clothing. While I couldn't describe the details of the frock, I do recall that it was of a shade of blue that matched Bennie's eyes perfectly

As for the hostess, Mundee, too, was a vision. Her eyes shone brightly and her dark hair framed her face with soft curls. Any Hobbit lad would have counted himself very lucky to have been invited to this dinner; to be surrounded by so much feminine beauty, in addition to the promise of an equally splendid meal!

But as we made our way from the parlour to the dining room, I had to wonder what had prompted Mundee to invite Bennie. It seemed that whenever the two came into contact, some sort of scrimmage was sure to follow. I couldn't imagine why in the Shire Mundee would want her dinner party turned into a food fight (I do not jest as I write those words, for that was, indeed, what happened on one other occasion. But I shan’t go into that, now).

I itched to pull Mundee aside and question her about her reasoning, but I figured it was none of my business and let well enough alone. Perhaps the two had at last come to some form of an understanding. And in truth, I was really beginning to believe that this was the case, because dinner was actually a pleasant affair. Events went along in a nice, smooth way. It was after dinner as we were heading back to the parlour for some conversation things began to go awry.

It started when we headed back to the parlour for after dinner conversation and drinks. Having seated the ladies, Bodo and Orgie were able to sit next to theirs. Alas for me, since I was unaccompanied I was awarded the honour of sitting between Bennie and Mundee. As I wrote earlier, not a bad arrangement for any lad to be surrounded thusly, but not exactly ideal for me. Case in point; Bennie, who happened, to be in one of her flirtatious moods, began nudging my foot rather playfully with her toe. At first I merely ignored her touch and affected an intense interest in the lively talk that was going on around me. Mundee must have picked up on my unease for she gave me a strange, questioning look and asked if anything was wrong.

"No...everything is...just...fine." I assured her.

At that point, Bennie gave me a more insistent nudge. If this kept up, others besides Mundee would surely notice and I fervently hoped it wouldn’t be Bennie’s parents. So Decide to try a different tactic. I pretended to assume that perhaps the nudge had been accidental, my foot having gotten in the way of hers. I tried scooting my feet to the side, then pulling them back as far under the settee as I could, to no avail. Her foot eventually caught up with mine with the result that this time, she ran her toe some ways up the side of my leg. I must have emitted some sound of surprise, for the conversation suddenly halted and everyone was looking in my direction.

"Excuse me....hiccups. Must have taken a drink too quickly." I said with a small, half hearted laugh.

It must have been a convincing enough explanation because Bodo gave me a friendly warning that I had better "take it more slowly, might get choked the next time, wouldn’t want it to come out of your nose, you know!"

Everyone laughed at this and turned their attention back to the conversation. I was relieved that Bennie’s parents hadn’t seen her little performance and caught on to what was really going on.

Mundee however was not so easily deceived. For out of the blue, she leaned close and asked in a whisper, "Was it the wine that gave you the hiccups or was it Bennie?"

She didn’t wait for my answer but went on whispering, "You know, I didn’t invite her. When Father and Mother arrived at her hole and she learned about my party, she wasn’t interested in coming. That is, until Mother mentioned that you would be here. Once she was here, I couldn’t send her away. And, she had behaved wonderfully...up until now."

I wasn’t quite sure of how to answer that , but fortunately, I was saved from the effort at that moment by a loud snort of derision from Lavender, as Orgie (with the help of Marain) told of his recent trip to visit the Blue Mountain Dwarves, and how he had managed to become lost deep in their mines there. So thankfully we were drawn back into the conversation.

"I’m sure their hallways must be dark and dingy, and their caverns unsuitable for hobbits to even visit!" Lavender was saying.

Bennie took that opportunity to look my way and said in a undeniably provacative voice, "I don’t mind dark hallways at all. Do you, Frodo?"

I pretended I didn’t hear her, which was a good thing, as Mundee had, and gave her cousin a rather dark look.
As luck would have it, Sally arrived, carrying a tray of tea with cake and clotted cream and the conversation turned to food. While Mundee and Sally served the guests, I was left sitting with Bennie who, after remarking upon how delicious the cream was, proceeded to lick her spoon slowly and deliberately without taking her smouldering eyes off me. I coughed and pulled upon my collar as the room seemed to become very warm.

When Mundee, once again, voiced concern, I excused myself, saying that I needed just a bit of fresh air and would be back shortly. I made my way through the kitchen and out onto the back porch. As I was standing there, trying to let the cold, crip air cool the heat of the blood that was racing through my body, I was startled when by hand upon my shoulder.
I spun around. It was Bennie.

"I was worried about you, Frodo," she said as she came closer. "I do hope you’re not catching a cold?"

"No. I’m ...not..." I started to say. I didn’t get very far. Her lips upon my own stopped me.

If My blood had been racing before, it fairly surged through my veins now. Her kiss was reminiscent of the sweetness of cream and I wanted to taste more. But it was she who pulled away, not I. The faint light that escaped from the partially open kitchen door fell upon her face, revealing the soft curve of a seductive smile. She moved closer and I felt myself leaning towards her, encountering a sudden, secret pleasure at the prospect of this tryst. I closed my eyes, waiting for the pressure of her soft lips on mine. Neither of us heard the door open wider behind us. Nor did I feel Bennie’s lips on my own. I did however, experience something that felt like a few drops of rain upon the back of my hands, accompanied by a splashing sound. I opened my eyes to see that Bennie had taken the full brunt of the deluge. The back of her dress and her hair was soaked. And there stood Sally Underhill with an empty dishpan and her hand clapped over her mouth. Though, whether it was to hide her shock at her "mistake" or to hold in her laughter, I couldn’t be sure.

"Oh my," Miss Sally’s voice said in veiled tones of mock despair. "I’m so sorry! I didn’t know you were out there or I would have waited to empty the dish water later!"

As the hour is getting late and my hand tires from my exertions, I will only focus on the major events of the rest of the evening. Suffice to say that Bennie couldn’t prove that Sally hadn’t doused her on purpose, or that Mundee hadn’t put her up to it. A heated argument, arose between the hostess and her foster sister, that could have been heard on the far side of Hobbiton on the other side of The Water. It looked as if the disagreement might become a little rough, since it involved the use of some words that cast doubt upon the virtue and decency expected from well bred, Hobbit lasses. So, Orgie, Marain and myself thought it best to slip quietly away, leaving the handling of Bennie and Mundee to Bodo and Lavender.